I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Randomize
