im gay
i know
yea but for you.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
she told me i tasted like america
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
ttyl tear gas
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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