I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
