Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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