thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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