I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
