Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
