similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
