Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
