you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Randomize
