In the future we'll all be gay
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
i believe in u and ur pee
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
