Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
