Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
