ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You pole danced in your parka.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
