she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
