I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
