Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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