his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
