**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
