butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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