I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
