I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
