That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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