I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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