A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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