I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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