if i can run in heels then i can drive
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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