still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
