also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
