I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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