so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize