is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
