STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
