White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
