It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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