rhymes with "ouble enetration"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
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