ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
