dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
