then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
