I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
