I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
