Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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