we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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