i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
the raccoons are back...
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