Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
