the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
