Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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