Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
