I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
