Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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