I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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